a few things:

my parents got rid of all the spider webs while they were here, and along with them, all the symbols and conceits that i had adopted to make it feel like i belong. it took my parents being here to realize it, but a lot of things changed without their help too.

the bar's been sold, and it feels like my family's gone. i know they're still around, but it's almost like that family is telling me to grow up too.

i am more alone than i've ever been. it's terrifying, but i feel more free and less fragile than ever before. it's time to decide who i'm going to be.

i realized that i think of real people as characters in stories, rather than of characters in stories as depictions of real people. i'm not really sure what this says about me. but i've also decided that the reason for my clumsiness is that i am really from another dimension where everything is lighter.

so i'm trying to keep my sense of humour.