if action is character, and what you do defines who you are, then who or what does not doing anything ever make me?

oh wait. i'm that girl who's always believed in true and everlasting love. you know, the one who stayed straight and monogamous for her whole undergrad, who followed her boyfriend to europe. yeah, that one who followed her boyfriend to europe, got cheated on, and then went back anyway; didn't you hear about that? she went back even though she didn't really want to, because doing what's right in front of you is easier than doing what you really want to do, and anyway, doing what you really want to do implies that you have dreams and ambitions and desires, and really, the only one i've ever really had or really worked towards was that one about falling in love.

oh. well. that's awkward. i'm almost 23 and i've got no dreams. the only one i've ever chased is fizzling out right in front of me, and i'm just sort of halfheartedly regretting its demise.

if this thing really goes to hell - which is now, more than ever, just a matter of time - i've got no plans, no escape, no dream to fall back on.