i work at a bar now, selling drinks in tops i probably wouldn't wear by themselves if i didn't desperately need tips and if i wasn't so desperately hot because nobody believes in air conditioning over here. i have a huge crush on the bartender, who shares the same name as my boyfriend but has a different accent. i can't stop thinking about sex with him, which probably makes me awkward when i am around him. i am really quiet because i can't say what i am thinking, which is, i wish you would fuck me when everybody else goes home.

for a little while i was wondering why my impulse is always to go straight to the sex, like i worry if people won't like me if i don't give them all i've got all at once, and then i justified it by asking myself, hey, is there anything really wrong with being just a little slutty sometimes? i don't think so. especially not in your daydreams.