its the last day of the year again.

i'm not doing anything tonight, and it feels like a really good plan. i'm not spending too much money on a dress, or shoes, or make up, or false eyelashes; i'm not spending hours putting all of that together. i'm not going to chug vodka before getting in the cab (as i have the past three years in a row, despite knowing that it kills me every time). i'm not going to cheat on my boyfriend, make out with ex-boyfriends, or look for a new boyfriend.

tonight i am going to have dinner with my parents, and then maybe go over to a friend's house and drink a little vodka and play some board and/or card games and stay. put. tonight i am going to take it easy, keep a low profile, and avoid embarrassing, endangering, and making a spectacle of myself.

and then, and then! this year i am going to finish my master's, start a business, make serious money, and choose a career. this is the year i am going to quit smoking, keep running, get rid of my roommate, travel with my boyfriend, not be afraid of new responsibilities, new expectations, new situations. this year i am going to stop talking and start doing, start doing everything i've been too lazy, or scared, or stoned to do so far. it's time. starting tomorrow.